tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55012892011-07-24T14:39:39.218-07:00The Third Church Down From The Dumpster<center><strong>WELCOME<br> WEARY INTERNET PILGRIMS!</strong><br> Here you will find<br>
~Sanctuary~<br>~ Peace of mind ~<br> And our killer CyberSunday Mimosa/Continental Breakfast for just $3.99!<br>
We also offer.. 24/7 BINGO,<br>a "Click"-Thru Confessional<br> and much much more!<br>
Start Clicking Your Way To Redumption Today!<br>
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joycenoreply@blogger.comBlogger511100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-32005179245113906612009-05-19T05:04:00.000-07:002009-05-19T05:05:24.057-07:00Say A Little Prayer for Sister Ani D2.She's feeling a little under the weather and needs a bit of devine intervention... light those candles, twirl those prayer beads, and do the dance of betterness... let's see what happens.AMEN*pokes JoMamma* Put that out I said candles!Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-27908567071763372922008-10-11T06:03:00.000-07:002008-10-11T17:58:45.375-07:00Today's Sermonby Sister Contrary*taps pulpit microphone and nothing happens**mutters and walks over to sound system and fiddles with things a bit and tries mic again*Right, that's better.Nebulism... free form religion... free to take a break for however long it wants to take a break for too. Even if it is two or three bloody years at a time... wait... forgot... haven't done this sermonizing Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1129009617236626972005-10-10T22:43:00.000-07:002006-12-05T21:42:08.276-08:00Got religion?Been thinking about you, the congregation, lately. I suppose it could be guilt that is causing me to revisit this place. I know the doors have been closed for a while now, and no sermons have been coming from the mount and all that jazz. It's not that there's nothing to say. I suppose that it could be that there's too much. It's a busy time for everyone it seems, and since Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1121907784869695322005-07-20T17:50:00.000-07:002005-07-20T18:03:04.876-07:00Waiting for Divine InterventionJust a quick notice to say that The Third Church has not closed for good. It's always going to be here, and the sermons will come in fits and starts (don't they always).A few members of our congregation have recently travelled the world to visit other members of the congregation, and we've all come to one conclusion. The world is one majorly screwed up place rightRahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1115704859441161162005-05-09T23:00:00.000-07:002005-05-09T23:00:59.446-07:00DOORS TO REOPEN IN SIX WEEKS (or so...) TEMPORARILY CLOSED FOR PEST REMOVAL!Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1110757131660072262005-03-13T15:30:00.000-08:002005-03-13T15:38:51.663-08:00Life is too Short to Pass Opportunities UpI bet that from reading that subject heading you're thinking this is going to be one of those righteous, do good, jump with both feet, grab on with both hands type sermons. Well it is, of sorts anyway. Though it's not only focused on the "big events in life" that these sorts of things are usually focused on. This one is more specifically aimed at the Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1110336451233360372005-03-08T18:43:00.000-08:002005-03-08T18:47:31.236-08:00Spring or Fall Fever and what to do when sports madness takes you...Sorry folks for the delayed sermon. It wasn't that the day was forgotten, oh no, not that at all... it was simply that a whirlwind of activity caused the lack of ability to sermonize! So it's heading towards spring time (or fall time if you're a southern hemispherer) and the weather is getting nicer and nicer. It's warm enoughRahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1109030303556435702005-02-21T15:47:00.000-08:002005-02-21T15:58:23.560-08:00Standard ResponseWell the Third Church is focused on people a bit right now. Well that and Pancakes, but then again why shouldn't we focus on pancakes? Light and fluffy and oh so tasty! We love them here, in fact we're going to serve breakfast this morning while the sermon is going so please try not to smack and chew so loudly that your neighbor can't hear the preacher!Okay, so people... we'll Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1108333731866004662005-02-13T14:11:00.000-08:002005-02-13T14:28:51.870-08:00No Time For The Humans? Well make some time!Welcome to today’s sermon. Hopefully everyone has had a wonderful week and weekend and is ready and rearing to go for another round. Okay, so that’s probably not true, I know we could all do with a few more days off from work. That’s life unfortunately, everyone could always do with a few days off… especially if they were paid days off. I'm sure Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1107735368845561142005-02-06T16:16:00.000-08:002005-02-06T16:16:08.846-08:00Our Ladies of the Cloth here at The Third Church know what is most important... a good drink, at a good bar! Amen Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1107231528594806482005-01-31T20:12:00.000-08:002005-01-31T20:22:43.853-08:00Shit Happens!
The world is a tough place, it’s hard, it’s cruel, it could be a lot better, and yeah, it could be a lot worse... nothing is perfect, there's no chance of that cause Shit Happens... lots of it.
It’s basically filled with four kinds of people:
1. Jerks who want to rule the world. (destroy destroy rule rule rule)
2. Jerks who don’t care about the world (ignore ignore ignore, it’llRahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1106537741174749822005-01-23T19:35:00.000-08:002005-01-23T19:35:41.173-08:00Theory of Relativity with a Third Church Twist
You Can’t Pick Your Family…. Or Can You?
There won’t be any science lesson with the sermon this morning, hopefully you weren’t expecting one.
Today we’re going to be talking about family. Traditionally, I suppose it is true that you can not pick your family. I mean you’re born into it, so it’s pretty much a “you’re stuck with what you get hope Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1106283144212499382005-01-20T20:50:00.000-08:002005-01-20T20:52:24.213-08:00+Welcome To The Third Church Revival Madness Week+
It’s been a long while since we’ve held church “all proper like” here, or as “proper like” as it gets at The Third Church, and we figure it’s time to get into some of that old time religion once again. Lots of stuff has happened since the last sermon… and poor old Vishnu’s arms are getting tired. Thought we’d give him a break for a while. So Rahiellihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15678786183847162821noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1087770669193196492004-06-20T15:31:00.000-07:002004-06-20T20:22:53.010-07:00Vishnu is having a July 4th B.B.Q
And you are invited.
Now what will you bring?
joycenoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1082264021124084122004-04-17T21:53:00.000-07:002004-06-18T21:19:22.596-07:00UNDER NEW OWNERSHIP & NEW MANAGEMENT!!
THE CHURCH DOORS WILL STAY OPEN FEEL FREE TO PERUSE THE HOLY ARCHIVES, SIGN THE GOOD BOOK OR PLAY THE ORGAN EVEN. BUT ALL YOUR SUNDAY-GO-TO-MEETINGS WILL NOW BE HELD AT...
B. JESUS TEMPLE
The Third Church would like to thank our congregation and hope that you will support this dynamic new religion!
Peace!
Sister Mary Jomamajoycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1081745181854507542004-04-11T21:46:00.000-07:002004-04-11T22:59:35.233-07:00OK.. here it is Easter Sunday on the Info Highway. And what a great place to be too!! Because The I-Hi will quickly take us anywhere in the world. And so today as a special Easter treat.. Sister Jomama is taking you with her to Vatican City!!! That's right we're goin on an Easter egg hunt at the Vatican. So grab your Easter baskets and let's get the F10 outa here… > > > > > > >
Woa! Pretty joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1081141495058276642004-04-04T22:04:00.000-07:002004-04-04T23:13:16.216-07:00This Weeks Sermon: Gas Stations Of The Cross!
Well it's the Sunday before Easter. Don't know if it has a special name like Good Friday or Holy Saturday do. Don't really care either.. Nope! I'm joyriding along the Info Highway.. just enjoying the view.
Oooo now this place looks interesting.. and I am slightly parched. Let's stop for "lunch".
Interesting stop. Actually I'm looking for this joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1080495652198935682004-03-28T09:40:00.000-08:002004-03-29T00:04:19.796-08:00Today's Sermon: Back To The Future
Well.. I'm not in Reedley anymore. And I felt better once I was outa there too. One would think a weekend in a sleepy.. well catatonic little American town would be somehow soothing. But Reedley is a dying town. The packing plant, one of Reedley's major organs, has already shut down.
It was reflected in the church service I attended too. In the sparse and joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1079941721182100912004-03-21T23:48:00.000-08:002004-03-23T23:04:47.606-08:00Hi! Joe here. Sorry for the delay. Sister sent us this letter to post on Sunday. But it was Mo Tolerance's birthday on Saturday and well you can figure out the rest. Anyway we found the letter this morning stuck to the tire of a wheel barrow that someone was using as a taxi to and from the bathroom.. Hey I gave all the tip money I made to charity. Anyway without any further adieu...
This joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1079251301891899722004-03-14T00:01:00.000-08:002004-03-14T00:04:01.826-08:00Moving on To Greener Pastures
Everyone has heard of death being referred to as someone moving on to greener pastures. This sermon is not about death so that saying has no meaning here. If you’re looking for the death thing you’re in the wrong spot.
Today’s Sermon:
By Sister AniD2
When I was growing up there was this one particular road we always took over the river and through the woods joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1078673984831752672004-03-07T07:38:00.000-08:002004-03-07T08:21:59.483-08:00Today’s Sermon: For What It’s Worth
As everyone in the world watches the US Presidential campaigns and elections what more likely question to come up than that of money? We all know that politicians are loaded, and this time I’m referring to loaded as having lots of money, and not all the other things they’re loaded with like drugs, booze, interns, cigars, sneaky officials in their pockets, joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1078078075639679092004-02-29T10:07:00.000-08:002004-02-29T10:17:37.233-08:00This Weeks Sermon: Art Imitating Life? Or Life Imitating Art?
I was sitting in the bank the other day, waiting for paperwork to be drawn up with regards to a house purchase. That’s quite a “spiritual moment” on its own, but in this case, the drawing up of paperwork has nothing to do with the sermon, it is the waiting part that is the basis for the words this week.
So during my wait I was joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1077439274994402872004-02-22T00:41:00.000-08:002004-02-22T01:30:04.263-08:00Today’s Sermon: All Good Things Must Come To An End… But Not On My Watch!
In the past few weeks I’ve been having some heartfelt discussions with Sister Jo-mamma and we realized that the Third Church was getting a bit run down, and that the pulpit could use a bit of face lift of sorts… as I said “spiritual remodeling” is truly the case. Now it is true that good things must eventually, someday, joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1076913482989075902004-02-15T22:38:00.000-08:002004-02-16T00:44:55.640-08:00Todays Sermon: All Good Things Must Come To An End
I was going to run a sermon sent to me by one of the church's regulars. It was about life after death. And it was actually pretty good. But I decided at the last minute to do the sermon myself. You see I've been thinking a lot lately. More than I really like to. Much more than is mentally or spiritually healthy in fact!
And I've been joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1076311589666415922004-02-08T23:26:00.000-08:002004-02-08T23:40:38.733-08:00This Sunday's sermon is being delivered by the 3rd Churches good friend Sister AniD2. And I can't thank her enough. You see the dog ate my sermon. You know how dogs eat imporatant papers all the time. One of those mysteries of life I guess. Anyway.. if the Sister hadn't of offered her spur of the moment yet incredibly inspired gospel.. well it woulda been an unfulfilling Sunday to say the joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1075626434826153752004-02-01T01:07:00.000-08:002004-02-01T01:28:12.233-08:00The Reason For The Season
Good glorious morning to you all. We will be starting our worship this Superbowl Sunday with one of my favorite Superbowl carols… sung by our special guest choir. Ladies and gents the Third Church presents The Water Boys and their lovely rendition of The Reason For The Season (I believe you'll need Real Audio)
Well I sure hope you all were able to hear that becausejoycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1075044948590973362004-01-25T07:35:00.000-08:002004-01-26T05:58:24.106-08:00
Better Late Than Never
Yeah.. sorry I'm late. Ya know how it is.. Leaving Las Vegas and I missed the plane. It was only about 45 minutes till the next one but after losing most of the 3rd Church's Send Sister Jo-mo On Her Yearly Retreat Before She Kills Everybody Fund money (a tax deductible charitable organization btw), on slots and roulette in less than 48 hours.. well I was a bit down. I joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1074448765290882952004-01-18T09:59:00.000-08:002004-01-18T12:19:54.546-08:00Today's Sermon: Sorry to keep you waiting folks
Frankly I forgot that I was filling in this morning. As most of you know the good Sister is off fixing her "crisis of faith" or PMS or whatever it is that's buggin her. I'm sure she'll fill us all in upon her return. Which should be next week!
Anyway again, as most of you know, I'm Joe. I've been a regular here for about 6 months now. Hell, joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1073811291496403892004-01-11T00:54:00.000-08:002004-01-15T20:04:44.966-08:00Today's Sermon: On A Wing And A Prayer.
Hmm-OK. Imagine yourself floating down a stream..
a stream of consciousness..
of cool clear consciousness and..
Oh crap!
Crap! Crap! Crap!
I don't have anything prepared!! Really!! I have no idea.. not a clue what my next joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1073241862196068212004-01-04T10:44:00.000-08:002004-01-04T19:06:47.310-08:00Today's Sermon: Holidazed and Confused?
It looks like everybody made it past the check points alright. Nobody was hit with any stray "celebration" bullets I trust. And I didn't hear about any alcohol related poisonings. Yep! So far, So good. And only 361 more days to go.
Reminds me of those signs you see on hazardous job sights. You know the ones that say "60 days without an accident".
Sojoycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1072638830630162232003-12-28T11:06:00.000-08:002003-12-28T11:33:15.840-08:00This Weeks Sermon: Fingers Crossed!
Sorry I’m late today! I was visiting one of our parishioners in the hospital. Visiting the ill is part of my job even though I really hate hospitals. Fortunately this patient is not facing a life threatening condition or anything like that.
Which is a good thing seeing as how The Third Church has no real “sacraments for the sick”. No magical feel good joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1072003651705276792003-12-21T02:47:00.000-08:002003-12-21T03:50:21.090-08:00Today's Sermon: 4 Days!!
I should be Christmas shopping.. That's what most of you are thinking right now I bet. I know the thought has been popping in and outa my head all morning. Not to mention that there are still presents to wrap and end-of-the-season football games to watch. Oh and those "special" Christmas cookies to bake and .. Well there's just a shit load to do still. So why are you joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1071465307161643942003-12-14T21:15:00.000-08:002003-12-15T21:32:41.216-08:00Tonight... IT'S SHOWTIME!!
Good evening. Welcome to The Third Church's first annual Christmas pageant. Instead of our usual Sunday morning sermon we all slept in a bit then spent the rest of the day staring down Saddam Hussein's throat. Gotta admit.. it's kinda cool how a flashlight shined into an open mouth can turn a whole head into a Christmas light. Of course it woulda worked better joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1070833519128036362003-12-07T13:45:00.000-08:002003-12-07T14:39:54.670-08:00Note: Today's sermon is late due to technical difficulties. Sorry!
Today's Sermon: One Lump Or Two?
Well evidently everyone is on their very best behavior these days as we did not receive one single confession this week. And the one piece of mail that landed in the guestsermon in-box was a letter to Santa from some 6 year old child. A rather confused 6 year old child it would seem. Actuallyjoycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1070179771233622702003-11-30T00:09:00.000-08:002003-11-30T00:10:06.623-08:00Introduction by: Sister Jomama
This weeks sermon comes from Sister AniD2. Now don't let that "sister" tag fool ya any. Like Mo (from last weeks sermon) Sister AniD2 is here as a sinner. In fact she is our A-#1 sinner! Our sinner winner even! Everything from mass murder (insecticide) to having mean hateful thoughts about her neighbors to inciting riots on other message boards. Now Sister A. joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1069609500105640952003-11-23T09:45:00.000-08:002003-11-23T10:23:31.450-08:00Introduction by: Sister Jomama
Mo was a lurker from the "outside" world. At first we were a bit perturbed with his methods and concerned about his motives. But there is hope now that he has been truly converted. I specifically asked Mo to write this weeks sermon.. which is why it is late being posted. Mo had some real 'splaining to do and I wanted to give him all the time he needed to do it.
joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1068973823674763462003-11-16T01:10:00.000-08:002003-11-16T01:10:44.436-08:00Today's Sermon: And on the 7th day the Lord said, "Let there be light"
And I said, "Like hell!!"
Which is exactly how I feel this fine 7th day morning. Like hell! Ya see your good sister has a raging hangover. Which is why I will be whispering today's sermon.
Today's very short and very painful sermon.
As most of you know last night was "Bingo Nite".. and a raging success it was. And like joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1068357741819235742003-11-09T00:02:00.000-08:002003-11-09T00:03:01.570-08:00Today's Sermon: Well here is my attempt at a sermon.
by Lil Sister Julie
As Sister Mary mentioned last week, we recently lost our pet fish. Thankfully the little one is still too little to ask about fishy heaven and hell, but I was curious to see how people explain such matters these days. Well for one thing, apparently its not as common to spew the "fire and brimstone" stuff as it used to be. joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1067769151419639952003-11-02T02:32:00.000-08:002003-11-02T12:58:09.496-08:00Today's Sermon: Back From The Crusades.. Like The Plague
Well first of all I'd like to say that the Missionary Position Crusade to Huddersfield, England was a fascinating & rousing success. In fact, with a little imagination, I should be able to pull 2 or 3 sermons out of the bloody (I just love saying that) trip!
But today I need to play a little catch-up.
I've been going over all the joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1065933291568039452003-10-12T00:18:00.000-07:002003-10-12T00:31:33.233-07:00Today's Sermon: You Can't Tell Luggage By It's Cover.
Passport.. check
Clean undies.. check
Credit card.. check
Ummm...
Oh, hello parishioners. My God! Is it Sunday again! Already! Jeezus.
OK.. well now that I've used the lord's name in vain.. twice, I guess I should spew out some sorta sermon here to cover it up. Damn I haven't even checked my Guest Sermon email this week. Lemme give a joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1065338743011292342003-10-05T00:25:00.000-07:002003-10-05T08:19:16.890-07:00Today's Sermon: The Missionary Position
The Third Church is goin to England! And in just under 2 weeks. We're calling it the Missionary Position Holiday Crusade. And we're maybe comin' to your town.
Well if your town happens to be Huddersfield, UK.
We chose the quaint township of Huddersfield because.. well see for yourselves. And this. This. And especially this! I mean, really, it's gotjoycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1064740434545357952003-09-28T02:13:00.000-07:002003-09-29T21:29:12.710-07:00Today's Sermon: The Spam Is In The Mail
This week when I opened the Guest Sermon email box I found 6 mortgage applications and about 10 offers to enhance my "male member".. and not just in length but girth! As I deleted them I wondered how many people might actually take out a second mortgage for such enhancements. After all in an abstract sorta way it could be considered a home improvement.
joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1064038557716218212003-09-21T00:05:00.000-07:002003-09-19T23:37:39.583-07:00No sermon this week!!
Say hallelujah!!!
We're havin our First Annual Third Church Picnic.
Please join us.. and eat, drink & be merry!!
For autumn falls next week!!!
Now if you feel you must be preached to then please pay a visit to the sermon archives (bottom of page) and then please come join us.
Last one in is a rotten egg!!!
joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1063537931847960352003-09-14T04:10:00.000-07:002003-09-14T14:05:32.150-07:00Today's sermon: A Sermon About Nothing
Midnight. And all’s quiet in Blogville. I’m all alone this evening. Can’t sleep. And there’s nothing much to do. So I’ve just been pointing & clicking aimlessly. Going here and then there.. and somehow ending up here.. At the Third Church. Believe me I wouldn’t have stopped here if I’d known it was a church. But I wasn’t paying attention. I just joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1062922078559549392003-09-07T01:07:00.000-07:002003-09-08T00:25:02.696-07:00Today's Sermon: Saints & Surfers
Introduction by: Sister Mary Jomama
Today's sermon is less a sermon and more a plea. Today we have a man on a mission. But before I introduce him let me give you some back round info. In 1969 the Catholic Church, the most infallible Catholic Church, decided to "de-register" some of it's saints because they were behind on their union dues or something. One of joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1062313802912184772003-08-31T00:10:00.000-07:002003-08-31T00:43:07.990-07:00Today's Sermon: Holy Shit It's George Carlin!
Introduction by: Sister Mary J.
This week's sermon comes to us via link. I believe most of us know Mr. Carlin. I know he was a great influence on me. I hope he influences and inspires you all too!! Just click on this here cross + and be whisked away!
joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1061708907995482392003-08-24T00:08:00.000-07:002003-08-25T21:45:47.070-07:00Today's Sermon: Worshiping Flames
Introduction by: Sister Mary
OK.. this week's sermon is a long one. It is from a dude I do not know. I don't know anything about his church (except what he says here). All he and I have in common is the fact that we are "burners". And that's enough for me.
Burning Man is taking place this week in the Nevada desert. It is an awesome week long event that joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1061104649512097602003-08-17T00:17:00.000-07:002003-08-17T01:14:25.810-07:00Today's Sermon: A Layman Speaks
Introduction by: Sister Mary Jomama
I'd like to introduce Joe. Joe was the only applicant for this weeks Open Pulpit. You will note that Joe is understandably a skeptic. You will also note that Joe is extremely honest and fiercely loyal.
Take it away Joe..
I'm Joe. I'm the swamper over at the Boob Tube Bar on the Outskirts of Blogville. Been in that joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1060499480864655822003-08-10T00:11:00.000-07:002003-08-10T09:48:50.120-07:00Today's Sermon: *Nebulisums on the Nutshell
Well I thought I'd grab the pulpit this week and, I don't know, maybe explain some unexplainables. I mean that’s one of the things a good religion is supposed to do right? Of course "they" do it with intentions. Intentions to confuse and frighten and make us coddle up to them. And they do it quite well now don't they. In fact, it is the one and joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1059894619045906542003-08-03T00:10:00.000-07:002003-08-03T00:45:38.106-07:00Todays Sermon: He's Back!
Introduction: by Sister Mary Jomama
We are proud to have as our guest speaker this week an icon among icons!! A guru among gurus!! He dropped acid with Tim Leary. Organized the Natural Is Nude march to City Hall in 1969! And was arrested 12 times for fraudulent lewdness yet NEVER convicted! Let's give a big Third Church Hallelujah for… Mr. Natural!
…and I get the joycenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5501289.post-1059290076068478642003-07-27T00:14:00.000-07:002003-07-27T11:12:40.813-07:00Welcome!
Allow me to introduce myself. I am Sister Jomama. And no of course that isn't my real name. That is my ordained name. Yes. I am an ordained minister. True, I did get my credentials via the internet but that doesn't mean that my calling is any less righteous or any less real than say, the Pope's! And I don't know if I could actually rattle off the 10 commandments in order. But I joycenoreply@blogger.com0